are we just not gonna talk about how the second one is floating?
that’s the power of the gay
(Source: pleatedjeans, via c0zzafrenzy)
98% of divorces are caused by Mario Party
yes your honor, this marriage can no longer work out after the trauma I suffered from my wife stealing not one, but TWO of my stars
(via tagyouareit)
Tell someone you love them today, because life is short. But shout it at them in German, because life is also terrifying and confusing.
(Source: huskerduorhuskerdont, via tagyouareit)
me pulling a knife on my grandma
IS SHE WEARING A LIFE ALERT
yes and she’s gonna need it
(via ironman-is-me)
no no no officer you don’t understand, this is medicinal meth
(via merelyperception)
If masturbating while stoned isn’t called weed whacking I don’t know how to live my life anymore
(via merelyperception)
i still dont understand how people have the association of sex = morals like i just dont understand how you connect the two
(via lettucefetish)
it’d be cool to speak like 20 different languages & keep it a secret from everyone & then during a time of crisis, u could speak some fluent russian to some russian guy holding a gun to your head & all your friends will be like daaamn
(via lightfaze)
Six Word Story (via leviathanrose)
(Source: litera-scripta-manet, via tagyouareit)
In your absence, you are everywhere.
